Do you ever feel sad while reminiscing about a loved one who has passed away, yet at the same time, you also feel happy while recalling joyful memories with them? In a culture where happiness is the ultimate goal, this experience is often seen as peculiar.
This experience leads people to avoid sadness at all costs, believing that if happiness is good, sadness must be bad. Yet, the interaction of happiness and sadness is possible, even crucial.
Can sadness and happiness truly coexist? This article delves into the complex dance between the two emotions. It tackles how acknowledging and managing sadness can lead to a more fulfilling life.
Learn more about sadness as a normal, everyday emotion to embrace the full spectrum of human emotions.
The nature of human emotions
At first glance, sadness and happiness may seem like polar opposites that cannot be experienced simultaneously. However, this simplistic view overlooks the intricate nature of human emotions. These emotions are not mutually exclusive; they can coexist and even complement each other in ways that enrich your emotional life.
The possibility of experiencing these two opposite emotions is backed up by growing evidence established over the past decade. A recent study has documented how people can elicit two opposite emotions at a given time. The participants reported feeling happy and sad at the same time when reminiscing about the good days, giving nuance to their emotional experience.
The notion of mixed emotions has also been supported by research in neuroscience. Mixed emotions appear to recruit brain regions similar to pure emotions. Given this, mixed emotions are processed through the simultaneous activation of neural circuits associated with different emotions.
The benefit of experiencing mixed emotions
Feeling happy and sad at the same time is not only a mundane everyday experience, but it also offers a wide variety of benefits. It’s essential to achieve greater emotional well-being. The benefits of experiencing two opposite emotions include:
- Reduces bias in information processing. As a result, people who are sad have more accurate judgment and decision-making;
- Evokes new awareness of priorities. This happens in the face of conflicting goals, leading to better goal outcomes;
- Guides individuals to find meaning in life. This leads to enhanced eudaimonic happiness — a kind of happiness achieved through meaning-making and finding purpose in life.
While the simultaneous experience profoundly benefits one’s emotional complexity, it is equally important to delve deeper into the distinct role of sadness.
Sadness offers more than just negativity. It adds depth to your emotional experience and is essential for personal growth. Understanding what roles sadness plays in your emotional landscape can help you better regulate your experience.
Read more: Seeking Pleasure and the Pursuit of Happiness
The role of sadness
Falling under the spectrum of negative emotions, sadness is often seen as something to be avoided. Yet, it serves adaptive functions that contribute to human survival and well-being. Previous studies have documented the benefits of experiencing sad emotions:
Enhances analytical thinking and problem-solving
When experiencing sadness, you tend to be more reflective and thorough in your decision-making.
For example, an experimental study involving 174 managers showed that under low time constraints, sad managers exhibited better strategic outcomes than happy ones. This happens because sadness makes you more cautious when evaluating situational factors, reducing the likelihood of making errors.
Additionally, sadness may promote systematic and detailed information processing and improve memory by reducing misleading information. In this state, you will be better able to figure out things, unravel complex situations, reassess your current situation, and come up with better solutions that adhere to your current demands.
Promotes better goal attainment
Feeling sad can help you achieve goals more effectively. One study found that sadness promotes cognitive change, allowing you to appraise your current situation more realistically when faced with unattainable goals.
This emotional state helps you reflect on the impact of loss. Then, you can adjust your beliefs, disengage from unrealistic goals, and forge more realistic ones.
Fosters social connectedness
Sadness also plays an important role in strengthening social bonds. When you cry, it acts as a social signal that communicates a need for empathy and support.
A systematic study through 41 countries revealed that tears serve as a signal of the need for help. This signal may evoke the intention to support the criers due to intense feelings of empathy. This signaling can help maintain social cohesion and reinforce social bonds within a group.
Improves resilience and facilitates personal growth
Sadness can prompt introspection and self-reflection. Experiencing sadness in the face of significant life events may foster post-traumatic growth through embracing new possibilities, greater appreciation of life, spiritual development, and improved relationships.
This introspection through appraising traumatic events can lead to personal growth, which is crucial for emotional resilience and long-term well-being.
The importance of emotional regulation
The enormous benefits of sadness can only be achieved when you practice appropriate emotional regulation. Regulating sadness is not about suppressing it but rather recognizing and understanding these emotions so you can healthily address them.
Moreover, suppressing emotions, including sadness, leads to a wide range of negative outcomes, ranging from poorer psychological well-being to a lack of social adjustment.
Central to this process, effective emotional regulation allows you to experience happiness and sadness without being overwhelmed. Balancing these two emotions is essential in maintaining psychological well-being, enabling you to respond to life’s ups and downs with greater flexibility.
By cultivating adaptive emotional regulation skills, you can better navigate the complexities of your emotional experience.
Read more: Embracing Negative Emotions for Mental Well-being and Personal Growth
Practices for balancing sadness and happiness
Insights from psychological studies highlight the importance of experiencing a full range of emotions — both positive and negative — to build emotional resilience. Only through experiencing ups and downs can you feel greater happiness, leading you to a more meaningful and flourishing life. By learning how to balance happiness and sadness, you can avoid the pitfalls of toxic positivity that lead to neglecting necessary emotional processes.
Balancing these emotions can be easy, but it requires sustainable practices. Here are five practices you can apply in your daily life to balance happiness and sadness:
Emotion validation
Validating emotions involves recognizing and accepting feelings, including sadness, as an essential part of the human experience.
Validating sadness doesn’t mean dwelling on it but rather understanding the importance of this emotion in your emotional landscape. If you ever feel sad, try to accept the feeling as normal by saying, “It’s normal to feel sad after a loss like this.”
Reflective practices
Try reflecting on your emotions by practicing journaling or meditation. These two practices can serve as valuable tools for understanding emotions.
Journaling allows you to express your emotions in a safe, private space, helping you to explore the causes of your sadness and gain insights into your emotions. In addition, meditation encourages a deeper connection to your inner experiences.
Together, these practices help process sadness and contribute to emotional balance. This enables you to navigate both happy and sad moments with greater awareness.
A simple, quick, and easy meditation technique you can apply to your daily life is deep breathing. Find a comfortable place to sit, either in your bed or living room. Take a deep breath and let it out slowly. This exercise usually takes only a few minutes, but you can do it for around 10 minutes to gain greater benefits.
Mindfulness and acceptance
Mindfulness involves staying present in the moment and accepting emotions without judgment. When applied to balancing happiness and sadness, mindfulness helps individuals experience their emotions fully without feeling overwhelmed by either.
If you ever feel overwhelmed by your thoughts, try to sit quietly and observe your sad emotions as they arise. Do not judge them, just let them pass like clouds in the sky. Practice this for 5 minutes a day and feel the difference.
By cultivating mindfulness, you can develop a more balanced emotional state where happiness and sadness are integral to your life’s journey.
Read more: Reaching a Higher Sense of Self Through Mindfulness
Self-care and self-compassion
Self-care and self-compassion are essential for maintaining emotional well-being, especially when balancing happiness and sadness. Self-care involves engaging in activities that nurture your body and mind, such as exercise, healthy eating, and rest. This practice can help mitigate the effects of sadness and promote overall well-being.
On the other hand, self-compassion is about treating yourself with kindness and understanding during difficult times. By practicing self-compassion, individuals can create a supportive internal environment that allows them to experience and process sadness without self-judgment. Thus, practicing self-compassion can help you to have a more balanced emotional life.
One technique you can apply to practice self-compassion is through treating yourself as a friend. Here is how you can practice it:
- Identify the events that keep bothering you.
- Imagine how you would react if your friend made mistakes like you did.
- Apply the same kindness to yourselves by making positive affirmations of the events. Instead of saying, “I messed up everything. I have failed everyone,” try to say, “I have done my best with the knowledge and resources available to me.”
Gratitude
Gratitude is a cornerstone of positive psychology that can enhance happiness while still allowing space for sadness. Practicing gratitude involves focusing on the positive aspects of life and appreciating what you have, which can increase feelings of contentment and joy.
However, this practice doesn’t require ignoring or minimizing sadness. Instead, it encourages individuals to acknowledge their difficulties while also recognizing the good in their lives.
There are various methods for cultivating gratitude, with journaling standing out as one of the most prominent. Utilizing gratitude prompts, such as writing down three positive aspects of your life, can also be beneficial.
By integrating gratitude into daily routines, individuals can cultivate a more balanced emotional state. This can lead to a state where happiness is deepened by the presence of gratitude, even amidst challenging times.
In conclusion
Most people would distance themselves from sadness, believing they can chase happiness alone. However, sadness and happiness are entwining rather than opposing forces. One can very well exist within the context of the other.
Sadness is a normal experience and an essential part of emotional complexity. Recognizing the role of sadness is the key to achieving a more balanced and meaningful life.
Embrace these insights to cultivate a balanced emotional experience where both happiness and sadness are valued as integral parts of your journey.
If you would like to see more resources on sadness, check out the Happiness Science Labs. The lab uses the research of the Institute for Life Management Science to produce courses, certifications, podcasts, videos, and other tools. Visit the Happiness Science Labs today.
Photo by Freepik
